Name: Redmond "Uncle Red" Taurus
Age: 40
Race:Human
Zone of Birth:Ur-Um
Wines and Spirits
Class:Path
of The JuggernautRenegade
Current Employment
Alignment: Corporate
Description: Tall, burly, bald, and the greatest mustache known to man. Redmond
Taurus presents himself as a macho man, making damn sure that his muscular arms are exposed at all times.
This 7-foot-5 wall of protein is dressed in a business suit and tie with the sleeves ripped off to
facilitate this. He's just as much a man of business as he is physical strength, exuding an aura of
boisterous bravado from his very skin. He only accessorizes his appearance with shiny black shades and a
watch on his left wrist. His slacks are tight around his impressive 12 inch bulge, and legends claim that
he's tattooed his company's logo on his ballsack.
Personality: Uncle Red is a macho man,
perhaps toxically so. Despite
this, he's a man of humble origins who clawed his way to the top of the food chain with only his
unstoppable drive, his faith in his product, and sheer force of being hard as balls! Those who work for his
company become a part of his family, and he makes damn sure that his family wants for nothing. So long as
you don't half-ass your work, Uncle Redmond Taurus will see to it you feel like you belong. He likes
working out, talking up his strength enhancing energy drink Red Schnutz, and presenting himself with the
macho man energy of professional wrestlers. He also tends to yell at the top of his lungs to emphasize his
point. To those he is friends with, he's just a burly, boisterous, fiercely protective teddy bear. To
his corporate rivals, he's the toughest, most stubborn sumbitch who ever held the title of CEO. Get on
his bad side, and your face will end up replaced with his fist-print.
Relationships:
Red Schnutz
Employees - Those who work for ol' Uncle Red all agree that out of
all CEOs, he's the toughest sumbitch who ever lived, but also the fairest to work for. Once you join
his workforce, you're considered his family, and so long as you put in the work he will see to it that
you want for nothing. He makes it a point to know the names of everyone who works for him, because
that's how much he cares.
Important Life Moments:
-Age 0: Born.
-Age 5:
Wrestled a wild animal buck naked.
-Age 8: Hospitalized for his early puberty, which led to both his
natural propensity for muscle growth and his 12-inch python.
-Age 14: Got way into weightlifting, hoping
to attract lovers.
-Age 17: Won "Strongest Bod" in his high school's yearbook.
-Age
19: Had his home repossessed by Ur-Um Wines and Spirits after the death of his parents.
-Age 20: Found
part-time work at an unspecified protein-adjacent production plant, and unsatisfied with the potency of the
product decided to develop his own formula.
-Age 21: Went permanently bald during a lab accident
developing his recipe.
-Age 22: Perfected the first recipe for what would become Red Schnutz, pitched it
to his boss, and was reluctantly given a promotion.
-Age 23: Sales of his product, then called
"Protein-Adjacent Ulti-max" was slow due to lackluster marketing.
-Age 24: Convinced the
marketing department to push his formula and appeal to athletic and thrill seeking demographics. Developed
his "Macho Man Uncle Red" persona based on this, and renamed his drink to "Red
Schnutz" for similar reasons. And lo, his iconic handlebar mustache was born.
-Age 25: Red Schnutz
is a massive success, and the company renamed themselves to "Red Schnutz Inc."
-Age 26:
Climbed his way up the corporate ladder after the success of his energy drink, quickly becoming CEO.
-Age
31: Became one of the biggest energy drink manufacturers in the new world. Got the company logo tattooed on
his ballsack.
-Age 35: Developed a grudge towards Mama Rie after she funded a corporate raid of his
facilities, in search of his prototype recipes.
-Age 39: Won an award for "Most Humane and Ethical
CEO."
-Age 40: Currently developing plans to reintroduce extreme sports to the public after his
company unearthed Old World relics.
Quotes:
"Don't you worry! Uncle Red's got this!"
"Keep on drinkin' Red Schnutz Energy, and you too can look JUST LIKE ME!"
"Mama Rie can suck it! My product's the best of the best!"
"You wouldn't be wanting to unleash the bull, would'ja?"